“DEATH SENTENCE” (2007)

Starring: Kevin Bacon, Garrett Hedlund, Kelly Preston, Jordan Garrett, Stuart Lafferty, Aisha Tyler, John Goodman, Matt O’Leary & Leigh Whannell
Written by Ian Jeffers (screenplay) & Brian Garfield (novel)
Directed by James Wan

Polly Staffle Rating: *

Kevin Bacon gave the best melodramatic acting of his career and director James Wan cued sappy music at all the right moments. But as much as the “Saw” co-creator tried and the “Footloose” actor cried, they just couldn’t pull my heartstrings with “Death Sentence.” I think the noise in my head may have been too loud. No, I wasn’t pondering our society’s obsession with violence or vigilante justice. I actually kept replaying a Slipknot song over and over in my mind - “People=Shit.”

Perhaps it was the idiots in the audience laughing and cheering during what I felt were inappropriate moments. Or it could have been the fact I couldn’t stand Bacon’s character Nick Hume and felt he deserved most of what he got. Regardless, when I left the theater I didn’t feel empowered like I usually do watching revenge films, I felt depressed.

I’m a pretty big fan of cinematic payback. I’d say they definitely tap into some part of my psyche that should hopefully stay hidden. But Wan just ruins the fantasy for me with this film. Instead of “Death Sentence” serving up six degrees of visceral Bacon, it delivers a few cool moments, but fails miserably as a cohesive whole.

Fans of vigilante films and video games will eat up Wan’s multiple homages. Besides the “Max Payne” poster, there’s a homemade movie nod to “Falling Down” and a “Taxi Driver” shootout near the film’s end. There are also cars, villains and a pawn shop owner that seem straight out of “The Crow,” a rainy funeral a la “Get Carter” and a car garage foot chase that so reminded me of “Grand Theft Auto.” It has been so long since I have seen any Charles Bronson or Clint Eastwood films I am sure I missed a few references to those, especially since this movie is based on a book, which was originally a sequel to “Death Wish.” Additionally, though a specific scene doesn’t seem to mimic the indie gem “Deaden,” there are so many similar set pieces, costumes and a bit of pain killer popping that there’s no way Wan didn’t take inspiration from it. I also got some John Woo and Robert Rodriguez vibes toward the film’s finale.

Despite all of this, I just couldn’t buy into “Death Sentence.” For me, it felt a bit like paying a prostitute dressed like a cheerleader for sex. The situation seems tailor-made for me, but when it’s all said and done, I feel cheated and robbed. It might be somebody’s fantasy, but I just can’t give into it. Just as my dilemma at a brothel wouldn’t necessarily have anything to do with the hooker personally, the problem with “Death Sentence” isn’t with Wan or any of the actors in the film. It’s also not the action that takes place. It’s the fact the whole thing just seems so wrong and morally corrupt that doesn’t sit well with me.

Nick Hume is a man that has everything. He has a great job. He is well off. He has a hot mamma (Kelly Preston) to look after his two sons - a high school sports superstar (Stuart Lafferty) and a slacker (Jordan Garrett). Something bad happens to the high school sports superstar. Hume soon learns the justice system isn’t all its cracked up to be and he decides to ignore the advice of “People’s Court” reporter Doug Llewelyn and takes matters into his own hands. Trying to balance the equation, Hume finds himself in way over his head by killing a punk “runt” gang member played by Gary Giggles (of “Spy Kids 2”) aka Matt O’Leary.

All I can say about Nick Hume is, what a complete idiot.

Sadly, “Death Sentence” only gets worse from here on out, which really is a shame because it could have been easily made into a really good movie. Bacon is outstanding as the anti-hero and Garrett Hedlund, who played the film’s top tattooed bad guy, was a menacing villain. I also applaud Wan’s directing. This guy knows where to stick a camera and when to go handheld. The parking garage scene works; I loved the preparation scene where Hume is figuring out how to work the weapons he just purchased and the finale shootout with Bacon’s botched hair cut is pretty bad ass. However, the plot holes, script flaws and the treating of the audience like we are a bunch of brain dead, blood thirsty morons is just too much for me to take.

Your honor, I object and wish to appeal because instead of “Death Sentence” giving me some heavy questions to null over, the following questions have been bouncing through my head since viewing this pile of crap: Has Mr. Hume ever watched the news or seen an urban crime movie to know the rules of “kill one of my homies, we will kill you and yours”? Guess not. Is it possible Hume is extremely unlucky and just so happens to always park his car and pump his gas at the only places in the world that do not have surveillance cameras? Maybe. What is the likelihood that if a family member of mine was ever murdered that the host of that dumb dating show “The 5th Wheel” (Aisha Tyler) posing as a detective would get assigned to the case and be more concerned with being an African American Angelina Jolie-lookalike than actually getting criminals off the street? Highly possible, I guess. Why the hell doesn’t the detective arrest Hume, when she knows what he has done and what he is going to do? Oh yeah, she’s more concerned with being an African American Angelina Jolie-lookalike that pops up, off and on throughout the movie so she can stand around and be… an African American Angelina Jolie-lookalike. Why does Hume, a well-to-do Starbucks kind of guy that lives in a really nice neighborhood, have a work shed that looks like it’s straight out of “The Evil Dead” behind his house? Hmmm…

But the biggest question this movie had me asking was: Is it likely that a straight laced businessman that prides himself on being a risk-assessment manager, would turn in his briefcase and become a self-righteous mass murderer at the drop of a Slushy when he has a grieving wife and son at home that he should be looking after and providing love to? God, I hope not. If so, I’m afraid that Slipknot song I can’t get out of my head is going to be stuck on repeat for quite some time.

- CCF, September 2007

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